Seducing Sleep (A Poem)

Seducing Sleep 

Time slows down, if for a moment

I now know what you had meant

(When you said take me)

Locked inside our loving embrace 

Focused only on one another

(Eyes widen with movement)  

Each breath rasps in perfect unison

Each muscle works for one intent 

Our souls intwine our bodies 

We become joined in those minutes

Forgetting that the world exists 

(My point becomes your eyes)

Our skin seems to melts to become one

Our souls seem to morph into our love

(I need you as much as you need me) 

It all ends in a climatic understanding

Time stops and then moves faster

(Our energy seeps away with the night)

We will never be able to turn back

The connection has been created

(Its time to rest and let sleep seduce) 

Ode To That Beyond Beauty (A Poem)

Ode To That Beyond Beauty

The beautiful

I ask this of thee

What shall you get as time passes?

I will kneel to you in our youthful intrigue

but I expect a bow in our ancient reprieve

For as things change so will you

Your beauty will pass quickly 

along with your arrogance brought by birth

For though you flash in exquisite fashion 

My elegant words remain undeniably immortal 

As the erosion of time wears you down 

I shall be sculpted by the weathered winds of wisdom 

for you beauty will never bring respect nor validation

Your beauty shall never endow you with status

your allure shall bring you lust, till age morphs desire into contempt 

When your time has passed you will die yearning the past

Unable to look at yourself through the eyes of the old

I though, shall age with weathered eyes full of passion

I will gain that which shall never be yours

be it esteem, or comfort of what cannot be seen

I will hold death telling him of what I saw today

you shall beg death to remember of what you once where

So enjoy your time youthful beauty, for it is very short

It is but a flash

Indeed, just a flicker of what the talented will enjoy

Never Hide (A Poem)

Never hide

Im not just angry at you

Im angry at myself

Im not just alone inside

Im scared of the taboo

Of being in love with you

Im not just a white man

Im also a devastated minority

I see you and crave you

I would rock your sedan 

But how can we make a plan?

Its terrify to feel like Im sick

I just can't fight the urges 

they represent my humanity

As odd as they are cryptic 

As scary as society is phobic

So let me put on my lipstick

Let me slip into this gown 

I can't hide beneath this facade  

a women inside, not actually sick

Just burdened by gods cruel trick

So hold me tight and love me

touch me and show me tonight

What it means to be accepted

I wish we could find a way to flee

My male body, this genetic Plea

To be attracted to the wrong side

Is not just a burden but a fear

Just accept me for how I am

I was made this way, I have pride

So know that I shall never Hide 

I will never hide. 

Lucid retreat (A Poem)

Lucid retreat

Burying the vivid moments in my sub conscious

I thought you would be my last Adrenaline rush  

Everything I do is inexplicably linked to this feeling

I make sure to lay you face up towards the ceiling

Watching your eyes is like watching the end of a movie

The colors fade and the screen turns into a rich black

Usually I see myself walking away into the darkness 

Wishing I was like you, full of beauty and harmless 

They say every man has a talent he cannot escape 

He become a mannequin to that of which he does

I would like to believe that I didn't have a choice 

That I learned to handle myself with a stark poise

I do feel some hint of guilt and regret somewhere

I wouldn't be pondering my existence if I couldn't

I glance at the mirror and stare at my callused eyes

We all have our goals and fight for a certain prize 

I glance at you, laying there in an infinite stillness  

I had no reason to choose you over anyone else

There was something though that made me know

That today you where linked to my life's inane flow

Im just like everyone else, I wonder why I am like I am

I don't know If I was born this way or if It was parenting

sadly though, pondering such things are meaningless

I can't change who I am, Ill act with optimistic vigilance 

There is no such thing as the sweetest kill in life 

Only those that we remember with lucid abandonment 

They are not something to be enjoyed or rejoiced 

I wish more than anything else that I had a real choice. 

So I live my life encompassed in a lucid retreat of defeat 

Caught living in past moments and future regressions 

Striking at just more than the humanity I attempt to create

I want an existence in which I have no need to self sedate

It's Just a Little Thing (A Poem)

It's Just a Little Thing 

She stood by the door leg bent 

Her hair was let down loose 

Her morals where locked up 

and her smile was evilly divine 

She took out a silvery blade

Lit a cigarette and laughed

A highball at the bedside table 

and a little gasoline on the bed 

The fire it roared and crackled 

as did the whiskey inside me 

and her body across my side 

and the knife inside my hand 

The red warmth invigorated 

As she lay in my steady hands 

and she closed her lovely eyes 

to take tomorrows nap everyday 

The scoundrels die most beautifully 

and revenge is a dish best served 

with a slice of meat and fire water

to keep ones stomach steady and full 

and so I killed my whorish woman 

and dumped her body in his bed 

I lit a smoke and sparkled some gas

and burned her corpse in his home 

So let us take a drink and celebrate 

the deaths foretold by the scholars 

and the lives forgotten by the public 

and the stories remember by the old 

  

In Love Wtih Another Mistress (A Poem)

In Love with Another Mistress 

Ive been on the move so long, I don't know what rest means 

My jeans are so worn, that my knees remain bear for all to see

The steps to my home are faded from the winter months as I remember 

It is odd feeling this nervousness before my own abode 

I held you on those steps, hands clasped tightly together 

Do you remember that nervous kiss before those timeless stars

I can remember wondering how many lovers have stared at those same stars

Feeling comfortably mortal and understandably transient before them 

Still

I ran away that october day scared of what you would think when you found out

Fire running through my veins, in love with another mistress of destruction 

Her name was cocaine, her name was addiction

I had your photo in my frayed wallet, held it every single day praying 

Even though I didn't believe in god, I still believed in you 

Gazing out that window, waiting for me to come and save us 

from the loneliness of our own broken hearted ways 

It had been so long since I looked you in those brisk blue eyes 

Your pain etched around your eyes and anger clenched between your fits 

My frail body swaying in the wind on top those fading concrete steps 

My hand Stretched out in desperate condolence for your lost years 

I trembled like I did before, all those years ago, ailing in body and soul 

Head bowed in defeat, life weighting on feeble shoulders 

Hands in my hair, firm and loving, holding me up before the strengths of time

Love never died between those years of trying to run from evanesce

Still

I ran away that october day scared of what you would think when you found out

Fire running through my veins, in love with another mistress of destruction 

Her name was cocaine, her name was addiction

Salvation I found in those arms, forgiveness in those stern bright eyes

You picked me up that day, feed me, and reminded me why I came back

But I will never become clean and I will never stay for too long 

I will break you heart again when I once again run for you 

I ran away that october day scared of what you would think when you found out

Fire running through my veins, in love with another mistress of destruction 

Her name was cocaine, her name was addiction

I returned a torn and broken man, only to rejoin the long road, back to her

In love with another mistress. Her name was cocaine. Her name was addiction. 

  

I Never Existed (A Poem)

I Never Existed

I walked home to something new

under my floor

was my only friend

She fell asleep to something old

how she cried 

to find my only friend 

I didn't mind being to near 

Though she tried 

To remind me why 

I used to hide under my floor 

to stay away 

From my fears deep inside

and Although I didn't know this

I was running from my very existence

So I told you I was fine today 

I would call

On another later date 

I hope you don't mind collect

I will be far 

From this very sad place 

So keep my lonely bed warm 

Under that floor

So that I may sleep again 

I just want you to know

Im am fine 

In this place I call home

And although I didn't know this

I was running from the truth 

Underneath your floorboards 

Underneath your floorboards 

I never existed